And what should make me launch into another bout of worldly-burdens-emo-angst but beloved TIME. This week's issue was quite a rollar-coaster. Cover story was on US presidential campaign '08, the only article I havent read yet, ironically. Lol.
Anyway, first one: The War With No End. And no.... They're (finally) not referring to the Iraq war, but about the longest-running insurgency in Philippines. Communists still thrive in Philippines. Well, I'd say. With the amount of corruption, poverty and displeasure at the government, who wouldnt be surprised to hear that communists are winning people's support? TIME covered it in a pro-NPA light. Or rather, anti-govt light. What struck me when I first read the article was the way things worked in the NPA. So, George Orwell was right when he wrote 1984. I'm not exactly sure how to say this, but reading the way these people fought so hardly for their beliefs and a sliver of hope for a better future, despite the risks and dangers, it's just heartbreaking. There are times when I really loathe this whole lassez faire thing (an opinion that most people should know) and I feel like communism can really make the world a much better place. Unfortunately there are very little people who agree. Oh, correction. Very little or none at all powerful and influential people that agree. The title of the article is so apt. The War That Never Ends... of course. As long as we exist, the chaotic struggle for power is eternal.
And that leads me to my second angst-thought: North Korea and it's nuclear ambitions. I am beyond confused as to why Kim Jong Il wants to create such destructive weapons. The typical reason is that he's using it to threaten other countries. But then, does he really plan to use it one day? Let's say the whole world ignores him, and if he uses the weapons on us and since it's nuclear weapons, we will all be annhilated blah blah so what would be left of the world? JUST North Korea?? The problem is that North Korea is not able to, on it's own, generate the amount of wealth and power the rest of the world can. In that case, if North Korea is the only country left, it will be stuck in poverty-stricken limbo forever. And that is just so lame. So why build nuclear weapons to get to the same poor situation it already is now?
Some logic I will just never understand....
And finally, this cute cute cute article on gay rams. Nah. It's main focus isnt on rams specifically, but on trying to pacify the group that feel that scientists who study homosexuality in animals are just trying to find a "cure for gays". He wrote something which I thought was so true and rather inspiring.
"Would a hetereo patch be so awful? It would allow bigoted women to get what they want -straight kids-and ensure that gay kids grow up with moms who, at the very least, didnt try to prevent their existence."
When I read the bolded part I felt really sad. Because sometimes, I feel like I can really relate to it.
"Gay people seem to fear we would die out if such a device existed. But we have survived, against the odds, through the millenniums. Darwinian selection, Nazis, the dulling effects of Will and Grace. I dont think a little patch would ever keep some rams from wanting other rams."
May I add, this elaborate set of genes that has produced same-sex attraction has also persisted through religions, cultures, society's expectations and discrimination, as well as in different countries, amongst people of different races, amongst people who speak different languages and so much more.
It is as Oscar Wilde put, during his trial when he was sentenced for being queer, It is the noblest form of affection. And it is in this age that people do not understand. They scoff at it, and sometimes place one in pillory for it.
``larcenciel
Music: A Dark Congregation - The Hush Sound Mood: haunted
10:44 PM
Friday, January 26, 2007
Pink Rose, White Rose
Technically my last day of work should be today. But because of my brainless, impulsive and too-nosy self, I readily told Nelvin that I could go to tpj next week when he remarked that there was shortage of manpower. So, off to tpj I go.
After fooling around at tj with my Drama juniors and occassionally collecting payment and answering queries, I headed back to office, where we were all cam whores for the day. I didnt bring a camera though, so all the picts are not with me yet. But I took some individual shots (with my phone) with those peeps that I was closer to =)) If there's one thing I will definitely miss, it's the people. No doubt.
It's hard to put to words what I really want to say about them and this working experience, albeit short. But hey, who's to say I wont be back after Feb right? Oh well.
Work aside, I love the gf!!! 2 roses, yesterday and today *beams* Effectively we only have 2 weeks left before she jets off for Aust once again. Dont really want to think about it though.
``larcenciel
Music: Qi Li Xiang - Jay Chou Mood: mixed
11:20 PM
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Sometimes, Family
To summarize the explanation for my recent absence, it's MALAYSIA FAMILY GATHERING and WORK, AS USUAL.
Anyway I borrowed this from a blog which I frequent all the time because of it's fabulous wit:
"Once a long time ago, when chain emails were prevalent, I, Reynard T. Wolf Esq. fabricated one such chain letter involving a story about umbrella bugs and a man on a bus being poked by an umbrella. This was inspired by the ricin poising of a secret agent in the former Soviet Bloc. Anyway, the guy got poked in the ass by the umbrella and the bugs gestated and erupted out of his anus. I made the story as retarded as possible in order to see if people would actually notice what they are forwarding. They didn't, and a week or so later the same email ended up back in my own inbox after i had forwarded it to all my friends.
The gist of the story is that people love to spew shit to each other whether this shit is true or not, whether this shit benefits somebody else or not or whether it just causes pain and misunderstanding. So be a good Christian, and shut it."
-khementi.livejournal.com
Oh, indeed.
``larcenciel
Music: none Mood: funny
12:31 PM
Sunday, January 14, 2007
Berceuse
Yesterday was, I would say, just the tip of the iceberg. I know that there will be times when just looking would send me to tears, when just hearing previous experience will make me sob and weep like a silly baby, when the mere sight of people abandoning these precious little lives would madden and sadden me. How emo, how angsty, yes. But how illuminating, how inspiring as well.
``larcenciel
Music: Cry - Mandy Moore Mood: sombre
5:16 PM
Friday, January 12, 2007
Melted Swiss On A Paper Heart
Most of the time, I am absolutely cynical about the world and everything else about it. But then gems like some of my colleagues come along and do seemingly small things for each other that can completely move and inspire me. I cant say exactly what it was, but you can be sure that what they did was nothing short of kind, generous, caring and most importantly, genuine friendship.
It's this sort of untainted-ness that always touch me. Outside, inside...yes, I've said this before, and every single side of me. It's just such a beautiful thing to see.
My sales now add up to a grand total of 9.1k. Sounds alot? Not really, considering that the top salesperson chalked up a whooping 25k! Yes, we are all in awe too. But anyway I'm quite happy cos my target is just to reach 10k by 19th and with TJ sales coming up next week, 10k should be reachable. Just about 5more orders =))
After work today I met wj at city hall. She treated me to my favourite $9.90 Thai seafood noodles from Thai Express and 3 sinfully delicious fresh fondue DRIPPING with hot chocolate. Trained back to Tanah Merah and she continued on her way to Tampines to meet Neha.
I should get to bed soon.... Gotta find my way to SPCA tomorrow morning! At least it doesnt start at unearthly hours. Cant wait to start my volunteering stint with the animals =)) After this whole sales thing, I think it's justifiable for me to want to distance myself from humans for a while.
``larcenciel
Music: All or Nothing - Arashi Mood: happy
11:36 PM
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Our Private Number
Love, like how I always tell my customers, You might not need TIME after 2 years, 3 years, 4 years and so on. Because you'd never really know what you want next time. But what's important is that right now, at this point of time, TIME is what's essential for you to score well for GP.
I cant predict the future, I cant tell you what to do, I cant tell you what I will definitely do next time but for now, I know that what I want is right here. And that I will give it my all.
Work's good so far! Tiring....but I'm enjoying it =))
``larcenciel
Music: Doing Too Much - Paula Deanda feat Baby Bash Mood: zonked
11:21 PM
Saturday, January 06, 2007
Work It
My working hours are from an unearthly 7am to 10pm, working 5days a week, non-stop for the next 2+ weeks. After that, 9am to 6pm, 5days still. Throw in a Sunday, 2pm to 7pm and there you have Leandra's NO-LIFE schedule for Jan 2007.
The first day was definitely the most tiring. Approaching SRJC year ones on their first day of orientation was no easy feat. It's like, after a while you feel so damned rejected and worn out because no1, the people hate you. no2, the people avoid you. no3, the people are weird. I mean, nothing against weird people, but for chrissake I'm not selling some half-past 6 sorta credit card or some useless teeny booper magazine blahblah but TIME. Renowned, established, useful TIME.
So anyway, I gotta stay at SR from 7am to 3pm before heading back to office to do some admin work, have a quick dinner and start calling my potential sources of income from 7pm to 10pm. Basically my job requires me to talk talk talk from 7am to 10pm. I'm always dead beat after a day's work.
But man, is it fulfilling. I dont know... I feel really really satisfied and happy when I manage to persuade some kiddo to subscribe to my favourite magazine. And when they say, Err I dont really want it leh, I feel even better because it's much more interesting to answer queries and convince them than straight agreement. Of course, it's great for my paycheck but the experience is so much more rewarding. So right now, I'm shagged but happy =))
Today was great. Spent the night at wj's. Slept so so much because I was too tired to do anything else. Had cup noodles for brunch and slept again till 5 before going off to meet bastard friends. A little send-off for kian guan! Enlistment date's 12th Jan. Aww...the poor dear.
overdue picts on xmas eve =))
Shall be off to get more sleep. Gotta work again tomorrow and for the next 5days. No joke =X But one thing to look forward to, 4e2 GATHERING!! *happiness*
It was goodbye 2006, hello 2007 yesterday! 2006 has been fantastic. Despite the emotional rollarcoaster rides every now and then, the disgusting examinations and other random weird happenings, I wouldnt say that 06 has been a waste. It's been a year of craziness, friendships, fun, laughter and at the same time, quarrels, sadness, angst and regrettably, deceit as well. But like what they say, there's always the calm after the storm, rainbow after the rain. And rainbow, indeed. In 2006, I lied to myself too brutally and harshly. But I know that what doesnt kill me only makes me stronger. So I'm here, embracing the new year. It's going to be another challenging ride, that's for sure. And I'm going to stay true to myself and believe, even if it is going to be absolutely idealistic and naive... Hey, big things only happen when you dream.
It's been a year since Jay ran away. I love her so much... I wish she didnt have to go in such a way. Whatever's left of her is the sweet and cherished memories of a lively and loving Jack Russell so I'm not going to cry, I'm not going to shout or blame. I just wanted to say that I miss my beloved dog -kiss
We're going to make this work. Even though the odds may be against us... I love you =)
And here's something for my lovely friend who asked suspiciously, WHERE ARE THE ANGST-ACTIVIST-LEANDRA-ENTRIES?? HOW COME I DONT SEE THEM ANYMORE? A resolution: Be more active in gay, animal rights and wildlife conservation movements! Remember my lifelong campaign to Erase the Hate, Please.
I think I've made some pretty good resolutions, how about you?
``larcenciel
Music: Congratulations - Blue October feat Imogen Heap Mood: contented