As one should be able to gather, I am madly in love with Katherine Moennig, or Shane McCutcheon. I mean, look at her, just LOOK. AT. HER.
She epitomizes everything I could ever dream of in the perfect person. Theatre, teevee dramas, lesbian roles, ambiguous charm, EVERYTHING. She graduated from the American Academy of Dramatic Arts, she's a 29th Dec baby, she lives in LA (whoo hoo!) and she loves sushi =) what's not to like?
Plus (I know Ive said this a million times) she is so hot. How can Leandra resist a person like that?? No, she isnt a person... she is a Goddess. My Goddess. My idol. Yeah... who says I dont have a religion? Mine's The Moennig Religion XD
On a more serious note, she is, coincidentally, what I want to be like when I'm older. Of course, I cant have the same handsome-yet-pretty charm like hers, but I wanna be all else.
"Sexuality is fluid. Whether you're straight, gay or bisexual, you just go with the flow." -Shane
``larcenciel
Music: She - Groove Coverage Mood: fangirly for shane
1:52 PM
Saturday, May 27, 2006
Tiptoe to Me
"And, if u ask nicely, they might even play for ur girlfriend, boyfriend, or both."
I went for TJstrings concert this evening, and I must appluad them for a very memorable experience. Infact, just the booklet itself was entertaining (if u read it in detail, that is) Dry humour. Good, dry humour. Music wise, theyre pretty good too. Ahh, how under-appreciated TJstrings is. actually, how under-appreciated alot of our Arts groups are in TJ... it's sad. hopefully, awareness for the Arts scene can be raised in TJ.
This week hasnt been all that bad... neither has it been very good. It's all very neutral... strange how people can feel neutral. Have you ever wondered if there was never such an emotion as being neutral, it's just a "feeling" conjured by humans because we have been hardened by the hardships of living in our artificial society, our pressurizing society that is, increasingly, emphasizing on constructed morals instead of the beauty of living and being happy? Happy, the only emotion, perhaps, we were ever meant to feel.
And Leandra angsts once again... *sigh*
``larcenciel
Music: Shou Ji - Rain Mood: in between
2:13 AM
Monday, May 22, 2006
Is it?
Is it okay to cry? Is it wrong to be angry, to be irritated? Is it right to be upset? Is it silly to be disappointed? Is it funny to be so affected? Is it immature to be infuriated? Is it correct to be calm? Is it fair to be nothing in the end? Is it? Is it? Is it???
What is it?
Is it really Silver?
TELL ME WTF IS IT???
or perhaps, is not....
``larcenciel
Music: Hall of Mirrors - The Distillers Mood: broken
10:35 PM
Friday, May 19, 2006
The Real Commandment
"Dont second guess yourself. It's love, don't be scared of it." -Katherine Moennig
On a more depressing note, I watched the last episode of season3. OMFG ShaneCarmen are no more!! =(( shane left carmen on their wedding day. but the scene where shane proposed to carmen earlier on was so sweet. sigh (again!) i cant wait till season4 comes out. hopefully their relationship wont be so sad.
OK yes, I admit, I'm in the lesbian, lovey mood now... *smiles dreamily*
``larcenciel
Music: I Drive Alone - Esthero Mood: les lovin'
9:23 PM
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Have You Seen Perfection?
If you were at HC drama centre at 130pm today, you would have seen it, spread out all around you. Cast, crew, lights, supporters. TJ Drama, I am so incredibly proud of every single one of you. Everything was so beautiful I could cry. Although there were some unfortunate occurances (like the stupid extension provided by HC was spoilt, WTF) the play was still seamless. Hah, looks like all that hard work has paid off =) Whatever award we get, just know that your performance today has surpassed a Gold with Honours to me, in quality, in spirit, in co-ordination, in passion and in committment.
Initially I wanted to add abit of a pessimistic comment in this entry, but thanks to my fellow WHIMP mate, I shant (because he expected a fully cheerful and happy entry, how could I let him down?)
So this is it =) A nice, happy entry on how wonderful TJ Drama Club is. Again, I say, I am very, very proud of y'all.
``larcenciel
Music: I Melt With You - Jason Mraz Mood: Proud
7:47 PM
Sunday, May 14, 2006
Embrace Me. Then You Have Embraced Life.
As usual, you preach about how wonderfully pure and sacred God Almighty is, how we are basically worthless forms that should always obey God's wills because we belong to him, how those who stray are doomed to a fate you wouldnt want to imagine etc etc.
There were messages like "love everyone like God loves you", "peace to everyone", "forgive those who have sinned against you", "attain true freedom", but are these really coherent? Are these really true? What happens if you love someone so dearly for who the person is and not constrained by gender? What happens if true freedom comes for you in alternative ways of expression, in alternative lifestyles? What about people who only yearn for peace with everyone else, yearn to be treated like everyone else, yet are ostracised because they have "sinned"? Are they "sinners" then?
As I listened on, I was angry, hurt, frustrated and confused. You speak so lowly of us, the truth, the real, living humans that stand infront of you. we are broken by your pagan faith. Do you know that? Yet you still hold steadfast to your narrow mindedness, you still believe that life is meant to serve a form you (think you) know as God. You dont sin not for the sake of humanity, but for the sole goal of attaining "paradise" and becoming "saints", joining your God after death.
Let me tell you this, I was crying during mass. I was torn inside. People around me may have thought that I was crying for my undying devotion to your Almighty Saviour, but i was not. I was crying for the people. The people around me, who have been blinded by uncertainty and chose to listen to... analogies, to metaphors... to nothingness. I was crying for the "sinners", how their true feelings and thoughts have been destroyed and washed away. How painful it is to be that way. Do you know that? You know nothing. You are nothing. Your religion is right, you are worthless, you belong to your God. You live not for yourself, but for that "God".
The pastor said something about how we are all flowers and vines of God's tree, and that God will always take care of us as long as we stay true to God's way. Those that "sin", however, will wither away and be fuel for fire.
I am a fallen branch. But I am still growing, I am growing together with others. We receieve as much love and care as you do, they come not from a "God", but from within ourselves. We are our own strength and life. Even if we wither and are burnt, at least we are of use; we provide fire for those who are cold. Unlike cold, haughty flowers or vines that only creep and choke other plants.
And finally, the issue of The Da Vinci Code came up. It's so pitiful you need to continually "brainwash" people that their faith is what is the truth with speeches, workshops etc. What is faith if it does not arise from within and withstand "evil" pressures? The pastor urged the people to defend their religion if attacked by others. So tell me, why cant I defend MY belief when attacked? Why must I accept what you think then? I can say that I am infinitely correct, and you, wrong. In the end, you are nothing. How sad.
How sad. You are sad.
So sad.
Sad.
Sad.
``larcenciel
Music: Number Five With a Bullet - Taking Back Sunday Mood: Hypnotic
6:08 PM
Friday, May 12, 2006
Dreams Kids Shouldnt Have
A beautiful girl. She has gorgeous hair, spread out gloriously like a fan. She smells lovely and her touch is so soft, so gentle. She is holding onto my arms that hoist me above her so that I can see her breathtaking beauty. I kiss her slowly, she trembles. She splays her hands protectively on my back, it ignites my desire. I love her slowly, inside and out. Then I love her fast; passion ablaze. I can make out strong, familiar features on her face, but all this while, I dont see her clearly. I dont know who exactly she is, but I know for sure that I loved her with all my heart.
``larcenciel
Music: Save Tonight - Eagle Eye Cherry Mood: unknown
8:29 PM
Monday, May 08, 2006
Fallback
At first, my head was throbbing with a million things to blog. Now, unfortunately, they have all disappeared, and all I'm left is a blank screen and numb fingers.
I guess I could do a summary thing about today. School was lame as usual. I had a terrible tummyache this morning, so skipped PE. After school, a buncha us headed to Kallang to watch aL's netball match. It was a wonderful display of sportsmanship, courage and resilience, so wonderful I could weep. If you were there, you would be able to feel their determination and efforts too.
I feel so small when I stand next to them. It's not just the talent, the physical aspects, but the fact that they can fall down and get up immediately. It's not just the impressive fighting spirit, it is the fiery passion and drive to push their limits. A match isnt about who scores the most number of goals, but the one who, no matter what the score, has conquered herself in the human spirit.
When she cried after the match, I felt so broken inside too. You have no idea how beautiful you are. Really.
``larcenciel
Music: When All is Said and Done - Trapt Mood: weepy
6:38 PM
Saturday, May 06, 2006
General Erection
While others are glued to their television sets, waiting impatiently for the election results, I, being the apathetic Singaporean teenager, am listening to a song about a dysfunctional person thinking he isnt going to go anywhere in life and frowning over which font to use for my latest layout.
But of course, I do know some things abt the GE, like the whole "who builds lifts is a better leader" saga and how some people vote for opposition just because. I roll my eyes.
Anyway, I chatted with LA guy abit just now. He was nice (as usual), funny (as usual) and intellectual (as usual) I told him it was election day here today and he went "Oh, well I wonder who's gonna win them..." I then asked him what he thought about the US democracy and he said that it was a fascist plutocracy, that the electoral college system was a political firewall designed to ensure that the masses never possessed enough political power to completely take over govt to serve its real purposes rather than the will of a rulig plutocracy.
Now, are we all clear why I enjoy talking to him so much?
He can pronounce my name perfectly btw. And that's a bonus ;)
``larcenciel
Music: Blind - Lifehouse Mood: Satisfied
10:13 PM
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
The Post With Hyperlinks (even numbered for convenience!)
Music: Sink to the Bottom - Fountains of Wayne Mood: cheerful
1:29 PM
Monday, May 01, 2006
Sweetness
After reading sy and hm's blogs, I cant help but dedicate this post to them. This is gonna sound very un-Leandra-ish blog post, but heck.
Love y'all, my mates =)) it's great having such cool friends. and as sy put it, we're all really different ppl, yet we click well together. And I am not brave at all sy. believe me, I was shaking so bad when I went up to him just before chem lect, lol. It's really nerve-wrecking, but ultimately, worth it.